Joe-Joe's Thanksgiving Invite

My memories of Aunt Lillie

Like many little kids, I was not sure how all my relatives were exactly connected to me. Once in a while I would be dropped off at someone's house who was apparently a trusted family member but who I did not know too well. These were somewhat surreal moments for me as I think back now where I was discovering my new environment. One distinct childhood memory like this was being at my Aunt Lillie's house. The coolness and hardness of the cement floor with the speckles all in it and the furniture that would make a loud noise as you moved it across the floor, the dim light in the living room. It felt good in the Florida heat. This is all still there and I remember it when I visit cousin Joe-Joe in this same house. This is how I remember the time at Aunt Lillie's. Lillie Riggio was born 11/13/10 and died 4/26/77. She was my grandfather's sister-in-law and mom of my beloved Aunt Gilda, who was mom of my cuz Dana. She was sweet and kind to me but I also remember shyness. I don't know if she was like that always or became that way after surgery. She had had throat cancer and they had to operate extensively on one side of her face, leaving her mouth and one cheek disfigured. I never talked to her directly about this obviously and don't know how she thought about it. My mom told me about what had happened and said she had been a beautiful woman. She was still beautiful. Her eyes we kind and loving, but maybe guarded with me? She laughed sort of a husky laugh now but part of that huskiness I think was hers already. Joe was not the best husband (1909-1953). Joe-Joe tells me about how when he was really little like 3 or 4 or something he jumped on top of his dad one time when his dad was beating up on her and how his dad flung him against a wall. Thank god she outlived him and had some time without him, right? When she died, I was told, she was watching Dana and Gina at her house. She had a heart attack in the kitchen. When my Aunt Gilda called the house just checking on them, one of the girls said Nana was sleeping on the floor. Immediately knowing something was wrong, Gilda hung up and came over. Questions I would have: where did Lillie grow up? How did she and Joe meet? The cheating - how did they deal with it? Ignore it and move on? Grieve and move on? Why not leave him? What if the woman cheated?